Money. Love it … Hate it… Need it… How does it make you feel?

4 Comments

1. georgina
   Posted January 29, 2009 at 11:36 am | Permalink

   Ever since I remember, I have held an underlying bitterness toward people with more money than me, even those I love. It is a feeling of not belonging and not being worthy.

   I understand this was part of my upbringing and the influence of my family’s struggle and perspective on the world, yet it seems even more ingrained than that.

   I am coming to understand that I have preferred to identify with the victim of society, rather than be a “perportrator of crimes” (of course, all those with money are evildoers and big businesses are all run by demons).

   I have been a defender of the underprivilaged in my beliefs and opinions, able to empathise and yearning to defend them, yet not really empowered to create change as I haven’t been able to change myself.

   Thank you Yollana for your article, I (30, white, well educated woman) can relate to your story. Good Luck with your endeavours.

2. yollana
   Posted February 2, 2009 at 1:48 am | Permalink

   @Georgina, thanks for sharing. I think you are right - the beliefs we hold can be more ingrained than just our own upbringing and family. They are structurally embedded within the systems within which we live and operate in our everyday lives too. And this can reinforce them within us. I hope that one day we, as a society, can transcend the whole dynamic of “victim” and “perpetrator of crimes”… but that’s a long way off. For now, it would be great to be able to choose to be “me”, free of any identification with victim or perpetrator, and so free to empathise and do what I can. Thanks again for sharing such a personal story. Many blessings.

3. Louisa
   Posted February 3, 2009 at 2:44 pm | Permalink

   Dear Yollana,

   Thank you for this article.

   It helped me take a step back and truly question some of my own beleifs. The stongest of which is “I will always be provided for”, this in itself sounded good and I believed had served me well until I looked a little deeper and discoverd the limitation that surrounded it.

   “I will always be provided for”, does not leave any room for extra, for abundance, for giving. “I will always be provided for” only allows me to be provided for nothing more. I’ve been so busy just “holding onto” that my circle of abundance has not been complete, has not come back to it’s source. I was unable to ‘give’, being too busy “recieving” and “holding onto”, too scared to let go and give in case I did not “get back”.

   My new beleif is “I always have more than enough, I give, recieve and hold onto money and my abundance in equal measure.”

   Thank you for this meditation. I look forward to recieving an abundance of insights in my new abundant future.

   Namaste
   Louisa

4. yollana
   Posted February 3, 2009 at 4:26 pm | Permalink

   @Louisa! How lovely to hear from you here… Yes, it’s amazing how well-intentioned beliefs can hold us back. I am truly glad that you have found a belief that feels more wholesome for you. As an aside that is a bit off the topic… I’ve been questioning the use of the word “abundance” lately. It’s a beautiful word, but it can also be kinda vague. Are you clear on exaclty and specifically what abundance means to you?